Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Obamathon Man Sells Out

Its official: Obamathon Man has sold out. In the past I have valiantly resisted the corporate powers that be, but those days are no more. I have succumbed to the Google ad-sense program in hopes that in one month's time I will have netted enough for a McDonalds® Double Cheeseburger. They really are delicious, and you can even taste the preservatives.

Fortunately, the overlords at Google have given me the freedom to choose where the ads go. I'm placing the ads toward the bottom of my sidebar, a location I hope my viewers will find aesthetically inoffensive. Also, i really hope that the ads can actually serve a constructive purpose instead of just being an eyesore. The ads will probably contain Obama-related content, and you may be made aware of some good or service you might actually benefit from. Keep an open mind, guys. I'm not entirely happy that I have to go through a mega-corp for ad allocation services, nor am I happy about the massive cut of the ad revenue they take, but I really don't have the time or energy to go about this any other way.

A note on ad encouragement: Obamathon Man is contractually obligated not to offer any message, image, or monetary incentive that would encourage clicks to sites promoted through Google AdSense™. Clicks to other sites must stem from genuine user interest, pursuant to AdSense™ Terms and Conditions, Section 5:

"You shall not, and shall not authorize or encourage any third party to: directly or indirectly generate queries, Referral Events, or impressions of or clicks on any Ad, Link, Search Result, or Referral Button (including without limitation by clicking on “play” for any video Ad) through any automated, deceptive, fraudulent or other invalid means, including but not limited to through repeated manual clicks, the use of robots or other automated query tools and/or computer generated search requests, and/or the unauthorized use of other search engine optimization services and/or software."

You, the clicker of advertisements placed by Google's AdSense™ program, hereby agree that you have not received, imbibed, or partaken in any form of authorization or encouragement to perform any of the above mentioned contractual infringements from the author and supreme master of this web page, herein referred to as Obamathon Man. You also agree that you have not received any similar authorization or encouragement from any third party associated, affiliated, or in any way connected to Obamathon Man. You also agree that you are not a robot, web crawler, web spider, or any other form of malware or malicious software created with the intent of abusing the Google AdSense™ program, or if you are, you are in no way affiliated, associated, sanctioned, or encouraged by Obamathon Man.

However, pursuant to Amendment I of the United States Constitution, Obamathon Man freely chooses to note that users who click advertisements placed by the Google AdSense™ program out of genuine interest will generate revenue, some of which will be received by Obamathon Man, and will be used with the utmost efficacy to ensure continuation of Obamathon Man's fearless and peerless coverage of the 2009 inauguration of Barack Obama. By clicking advertisements placed by the Google AdSense™ program, you agree that this statement represents a purely factual utterance, not an encouragement, authorization, or anything that could be construed thusly, by Obamathon Man, and that you click the ad out of genuine interest. You also agree that you will not hold Obamathon Man liable for any data interruptions, computer crashes, or hurt feelings which may result from clicking advertisements placed by the Google AdSense™ program.


No comments:

Post a Comment